Thursday, January 3, 2008

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year, boy was I ready for 2008 to arrive! I hope everyone had an awesome Christmas. This just wasn't the year for our family. Katelyn got really sick the week before Christmas, I thought she had a bad cold and took her to the doctor twice (Thursday and Friday) they assured me she was fine. Monday night, Christmas Eve, Jeff and I left my moms house to take Kate to the Children's Urgent Care, she was still doing so awful! After many tests and torturing of my poor child, they confirmed she had an ear infection and pneumonia. They sent us home with a strong antibiotic and breathing treatments for Kate. Needless to say we had to cancel all of our plans for Christmas day. Jeff and I were so bummed. You spend all this time getting ready for Christmas and you work so hard making sure your children are going to love the day - then they can't even enjoy it or celebrate. We spent the day just the three of us and after Kate's 2nd nap, she was really fun getting all her toys (Santa came during her nap). Needless to say, December 26th all the decorations came down and we decided to look forward to next year! Thursday I ended up at the doctors with a sinus infection - we just weren't feeling well around here. We did have a nice week-end with my dad and Nancy in town, Kate was doing better and enjoyed being with everyone. We celebrated the New Years Day with Jeff's family - finally doing our Christmas together. We had a wonderful day and so enjoyed watching Kate and her cousin open presents! Katelyn is much better but I took her back to the doctor yesterday and she still has a nasty ear infection...we have a new antibiotic to try for another 10 days, bless her heart!
Emotionally, I am doing pretty well myself. I still have these intense moments where I feel like my heart stops beating and the pain is so intense from missing my girls. I can do nothing but let my heart hurt, I believe it is part of the healing process and I have to feel the pain sometimes. I just keep praying to God for understanding and peace. I pray constantly for him to help me heal, I don't want to spend my life angry and bitter over our loss. I struggle to believe he has a better plan for us because I liked the plan of my daughters growing up with us - maybe someday I will understand. Those of you who acknowledged/honored my girls this holiday season have no idea how incredible it was to Jeff and me. I feel so afraid someone may forget that they are still our daughters and are still very real to us. I so appreciate those who recognize they live so strongly in our hearts...the healing will continue forever. Jeff and I will forever be changed people from what we have experienced. On that same note, our marriage has grown stronger then I ever believed it could. I am the luckiest girl in the world because I have the most amazing husband, family and marriage! To make that even better we have a beautiful living child who fills our hearts with complete happiness! It's hard to be sad when you have all that!
Enough of my deep thoughts. I don't know what it is about a new year but it rejuvenates me! I do feel really excited and hopeful for 2008, it is going to be a wonderful year! Jeff and I booked a cruise to the Bahamas and we leave February 29th, a great way to celebrate 4 incredible years of marriage! Jeff will also finish his MBA this August and prayerfully we will be blessed with a safe healthy pregnancy giving us another child! Here's to 2008, I hope you all have as much hope and peace as I do entering this year!


Jennifer said...

Happy New Year! Your posts are always so amazing, I look forward to them. You are such a beautiful, and strong woman. I wish you, Jeff, and Kate the best New Year ever! And your baby girls will forever live in all the hearts of the people who you have touched.

Hope the new year brings you much joy, and a healthy family!

Jennifer Mautz

Chris said...

Happy New Year! I'm sorry you had the sickness bout over Christmas. We can relate to that here. Santa came for Lindsay during her nap too! That's so exciting you guys have a cruise booked! You both deserve a get away for sure! I'm glad the new year is bringing you peace and hope. Jennifer said it best...your girls WILL live forever in so many of us who you have touched. I'm praying for you that 2008 brings you all much love, peace & happiness!!

Kelly & Brent said...

Happy New Year Katie! I am so sorry to hear that you and Katie were sick. I think it is going around everywhere. Madison ended up with an ear infection over the holidays too and I am now sick with a sinus infection. Yuck!

I am glad that you guys got to spend the holidays with family and enjoying time with Katie. I know she brings so much joy to your life...what a great little one to have around.

Keep your faith are amazing. I am sure your little girls are VERY honored and blessed to have you and Jeff as their parents.

Wish you a wonderful 2008! Hope we can get together soon.

Kelly Willson Wardrop

The Partins said...

I hope you have a blast on your cruise! We love cruises. Tell Jeff I said congrats on his MBA! I know that he will be so glad to have that over with.

Kelly & Brent said...

I just realized that I kept calling Kate Katie in my earlier post. So sorry about that. :)
~Kelly Wardrop

Amy said...

Katie, I have always loved the unyielding faith and hope within you, no matter what the circumstances. It was really inspiring to read your thoughts. You and Jeff are blessed with an amazing marriage and family. I love the message about the girls spending Christmas with Jesus and know that they are a part of the choir of angels, singing everyday. Just wanted you to know that I'm thinking about you...everyday in fact. I'm praying for all the love, hope, happiness, and blessings in the world to come your way in 2008.