Saturday, April 4, 2009

4 months old, one year ago today and an eventful week!

I need about 5 more hours in everyday right now...I simply cannot find 5 minutes to myself lately. It is Saturday night, 9pm, the kids are in bed, I am leaving for the beach tomorrow, I still have to pack for both the kids and myself, I need to get ready for an early Easter at my in-laws tomorrow and I need to finish the laundry. Instead, I poured myself a glass or wine and decided I was going to sit down for a few minutes and have some time for myself, so here I am. It has been one heck of a week around here...to say the least! Yesterday was one year ago since my embryo transfer (in simple words, the day I became pregnant with my little man)!! I will never forget that day, my mom and I went and got pedicures and I sat there the whole time praying with every ounce of my soul that God would allow me to experience a pregnancy again, one with a happy ending. It is amazing how much has changed in one year, it is amazing to reflect on our blessings after so much struggle and pain! Yesterday was also Blake's 4 month birthday, I can't believe he is already 4 months old! At his doctors appointment he was exactly 15lbs, 25.5 inches and his head was 17 inches, he is a BIG boy, a beautiful big boy! We had a scare with Blake this week and it led to an exhausting week. Tuesday afternoon I was sitting on the floor playing with Blake, he was in his bouncy seat and Kate and my niece Jenna were having an Easter egg hunt around the house. All of the sudden Blake's face went completely red, I picked him up over my shoulder and his body went completely frozen, I didn't hear anything and I flipped him around to look at him and he wasn't breathing, he was completely pale and blue around his mouth, his limbs were locked in the most bizarre way. I screamed, ran into the other room towards my front door, (I think I was going to go to my neighbors) when I got to the front door and realized he still wasn't moving or breathing I sat back on the floor with him and kept trying to get him to breath, finally he came to and just whimpered then was fine. I have NEVER been so scared in my entire life. Thankfully my sister came right over. I called the pediatrician and they told me it could have been a number of things but because of his young age I needed to take him to the hospital. I was so distraught that I told Jeff we had to go to the urgent care, right after we checked in there I realized we were supposed to go to the children's hospital...since the doctor was already checking Blake he said we needed to put him in an ambulance to go to the hospital in case it were to happen again. This was frustrating because I knew this was about liability and we should have just gone straight there. It was absolutely gut wrenching to watch all of this, there were 5 emt's who came in, they hooked Blake up to all the monitors, took him from us, put him on this huge stretcher and made me ride in the front seat, I got in the front of the ambulance and lost it, I just cried, my sweet little baby was just looking all around, holding onto one man's finger and looked the size of a peanut on that big stretcher. We ended up spending the night at the hospital so they could monitor Blake all night, I slept in the crib with him in the hospital room and watched him and the monitors all night. I knew in my heart he was OK but it was so scary and I was so afraid of what had happened. The doctors really don't know what happened, they said he could have held his breath for some reason (which sounds really crazy to me because we were just playing), he could have had an apnea episode, it couldn't have been a seizure because he was awake afterwards, but overall they seem to think he could have silent reflux and they are putting him on meds for that. I think the reflux is the most logical because it was like he choked but I didn't hear it, the way his face turned so red. They started him on Zantac and he is on an apnea monitor at night for the next few weeks to make sure nothing happens again, especially when we aren't watching him. I hate that he has to have the monitor, I hate all the wires but I am glad we are making sure he is OK and I can at least get some sleep knowing his heart and breathing are being watched all night long. I know in my heart he is fine and I really think it was a freak thing but it scared the living he** out of me. The way his body felt with his limbs locked scared me the most, the doctor told me that it was probably from the lack of oxygen to his brain and that he probably panicked too. It was awful! But he is fine and everyone was amazing, the doctors were so thorough and helpful and for that I am grateful! SO needless to say, my already busy week was thrown for a big loop and it made it all even crazier! Blake was an angel through all of this, he is so happy and content, he hardly made a peep at the hospital, he slept through the night there and just smiled at everyone, he is a complete ham! I am so thankful I was right there when the incident happened and I pray to never experience that again!!

Kate had a great week, she has been so sweet to Blake, I scared her and Jenna to death because I went into such a panic so she keeps asking me if Blake is OK now. I ended up missing her Easter party at school and was so upset about it but thankfully my mom was able to go in my place, Kate thought it was great to have Meme there so that was perfect! I am so excited to take her to the beach this week, she has honestly asked me every half hour if it was time to go to the beach yet. She is really excited and it will be so fun to get her swimming again. I am going with my friend Erin who has a boy Kate's age and a girl a few months older than Blake so it will be an adventure, the guys are joining us on Wednesday! I am looking forward to the break and to hopefully relax a little!

My awesome new camera is getting fixed (don't ask) so I am using my old one and can hardly stand it but here are a few new pictures!
Blake LOVED his cereal last night!

Kate was my big helper!


All Smiles!
I love this picture of my boys!
I am off to pack and off to the beach, have a great week!

5 comments:

Kelly and Brent said...

Oh Katie I am SO sorry you had to experience this nightmare. My heart skipped a beat when I read your post! I am glad everything is okay with Blake but I can only imagine what you were feeling and going through. We are thinking about you all and hope that Blake's episode was a freak one and won't happen again.

Enjoy the beach this week...you deserve it! Can't wait to see pics :)

Kim said...

Hi, dear friend. We had so much fun last night playing TP-the 90's! Have a great time at the beach and a Happy Easter! Can't wait till we have our "Mexican night" when you guys are back in town!

Jennifer said...

Katie, I can't believe what you have been through this past week... How scary!!! I am so glad you were able to get Blake to breathe again and the doctor's think it is a freak episode. I pray that the medicine helps Blake so it will never happen again. Please know we are thinking of Blake!

Have a great time at the beach, I am sure it is a much needed vacation :)

Donnetta said...

OMG - Katie!! How unbelievably TERRIFYING! I have chills all over me right now. Thank the Lord everything is ok!!!

Have a great, safe trip. Try not to lose your mind before the big boys get down there! :)

Kate said...

WOW what a week!!! That must have been so scary for you!! I'm glad he is ok. His pictures are ADORABLE!! You have one handsome little man Katie, and a beautiful little girl. I love the pic of your 2 men. :) So sweet. Hope you are having fun at the beach.